I have 3 topics that I’ve been really anxious/excited about lately, so I THOUGHT (see what I did there lol) that I would share it with you guys. These are completely different subjects and I will be posting in my Thoughts category a lot because I feel that maybe what I’m feeling, is also what someone else is feeling and having difficulty with.
Turning 20: As you guys should know by now, I will be turning 20 later this year in December (50 Facts About Me). Every other year I would announce to everyone that I would be 18 in 3 months or as soon as I turned 18 I would say “19 next year!”. So, every other year I would have this excitement about my birthday that this year, I just don’t know if I have that feeling. I feel as I’m growing older and moving on from childish things, I do not get to see my family and friends as much as I would like or my sweet animals. I know that growing older is apart of life and sooner or later we all have to do it, it’s inevitable. My point is, when did growing older consist of growing apart from the people you love the most? As teenagers we’re so eager to get out of the house and away from our parents’ grasp but little do we know how much we still need them. You guys I swear to you, I was so attached to my Mom and having to do things without her or feeling silly for asking her about the simplest things is so hard. All I’m trying to say is that, do not be so caught up in the future that you forget about the present. I have trouble with this quite a lot; I try to work hard for what I want and achieve my dreams but in the process I’m forgetting that I have a little sister starting her freshmen year in high school. Our parents are growing older as well, time passing us by so quickly. I don’t know, maybe I’m just being a big cry baby and just need to get over it, lol.
Death: Not so lighthearted topic, I know. As death is something that I’m dealing with at the moment, possibly for a lifetime, I feel the need to let my thoughts be known. My Dad told me once that death is the only certain thing in our lives, everything else is not exactly “written in stone”. At times, I forget that I no longer have my bestfriend, my sweet little brother with me and that feeling (I’m often told) will not go away, at least for a while. Death is an extremely hard concept to wrap my head around. You know that they’re gone and you know, that they’re in a much better place but at that same time you think, “that much better place everyone keeps talking about, is with me.” Everyone grieves differently, that I have learned all to well. The one thing that everyone can accept about death is that, that person who is now gone, will never truly be gone. You will still have those memories and those little things around the house that remind you of them. As the famous William Penn quote says: “Death cannot kill, what never dies…”. Death cannot kill those memories of those silly games or inside jokes my brother and I had. Death will never kill my love for him and the love I know he had for me and my family. So all in all lift your head up, do not let death get the best of you. You will cry, you will lay in bed never wanting to get out and you will sometimes wonder why them? As silly as it sounds, try to be happy knowing that the person you have lost, wants you to live your life and be the best you can be.
Why I Love To Write: Writing, has always come so naturally to me. I’m not a pro by far but it’s something I lose myself in. Writing gives me the words that I often cannot explain aloud. It’s something that I come back to over and over, as it’s therapeutic for me. As all writers do I write what comes naturally for me, what I find inspiring. I write because if there’s even a tiny shred of possibility that I could help someone through my writing, I’ve accomplished what I set out to. Writing is an art, often overlooked by what some think is so easy. Some days, you get your pen and paper (laptop) out and NOTHING, there are no words that come to you and if some do, they do not make much sense. That can be so frustrating, when you just cannot find the words you want/need to say so badly. Other days, you just cannot stop writing; inspiration is found easily and there are no words left unsaid. I would love to have a career with writing, that’s my dream. Anyone who is passionate about anything really, I say go for it. If you don’t, you will always be wondering in the back of your mind, what if? What if I had just taken a chance and went for what I love? So, I choose to follow what comes naturally to me and what I think will be a positive impact on other’s lives.
So, there ya go! Three subjects that have been on my mind lately. I am no expert by far in any of those things but I feel that if I shared my thoughts, people would learn a bit more about me and hopefully take something positive and helpful away from it all. Thanks so much for reading, I hope I didn’t bum you guys out too badly, lol.
XO LOVE, LEE